Recurring dreams

I have been running 
For quite some time now
From you
And the things that remind me of you

But itseems as if
I have not run fast enough
For everytime I look back
I see that you are closer than before

How long will you stay with me
Even though your real self stays far from me
Why do visit me
Time and time again
In my dreams
And in my waking thoughts

What is it that you did
That bounds me to you
And you to me
Neither do I know
Nor do you care

What purpose do you have
That you so frequently visit me
In my dreams
Letting me hold your hand
And holding mine back
Why do you give me so much joy in my sleep
Only to strip me away from it when I wake

Why do I write these fucking letters
Why do I still fucking care
Why do I still stare
At my fucking screen

Well fuck it
There's nothing I can do about it
You will not turn around to look
No matter how much I write or scream
From the looks of it
You will forever be a recurring dream


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