It is weighing me down

I just laughed for the past few minutes
And now I'm back to where I started
The smile has been yet again
Wiped off of my face
And the thoughts I tried to run from
Have caught up to me
Yet again
It is an endless cycle
And now it is weighing me down

My entirely has become so heavy now
That my feet seem to be leaving marks
In even the hardest of floors I walk upon

Ever since I was a kid
I dreamt of flying
But now, all I do is sink
Forever and even after forever
There are times when I see a light
For a brief moment
I swim towards it
With my eyes wide open
For I know that if I were to blink
Even once, the light would disappear

But I am also only human
I cannot go without blinking
Even if I don't want to
It is not upto me you see

It is not upto me you see
If I should harbour feelings for you
Or just empty my heart of them
It just happens
And it is weighing me down now

I thought I could go on
Ignoring all of these thoughts
But I can't
I want to
But I can't

I don't know what else to write

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